"What, that you’re lying in a hammock underneath an orangutan nest?”
Time is so odd, as is the sense and perspective of it. I feel like I’ve been here so long, that my arrival was ages ago, that so much has happened but so little and that it is going by fast and slow.
Sedikit dem Sedikit, little by little, is my beginners mantra and continues to be as I journey through this experience. Taking everything one step at a time, embarrassing myself a little in order to succeed at large, trying the language as I try the food, diving in deep head first, letting go of things that I cant control, releasing negative feelings of fear, anger, sadness so to become centered , balanced and at peace with the environment.
After one particular day in the forest, of my first time searching, finding and following I realized and accepted I am more of a beginner than I thought.
It was one of the most physically and mentally challenging days of my life. And I thought climbing Mt. Shasta was hard. I started out feeling unsure and doubtful about where to go, being with just an assistant, feeling he was unsure about being with me, facing and fearing the dreadful deathwish boardwalks, becoming frustrated, trying to laught it off even when I tripped and fell hard, bruising my leg. I couldn’t imagine every day being like that and I still cant, but it has become more easily acceptable for my mind and body, the physical labor of walking in a peat swamp, avoiding holes and the deep areas of water, walking on the roots, the sides, taking large high steps over roots, branches, lianas, fallen trees, trying to ignore being eaten alive by mosquitoes and looking out for fire ants. And then I remember what it is worth, to survive the challenges ofsuch an extreme, wild environment and its wildlife, to be surrounded by such a high density of biodiversity and then to find what you are looking for: orangutans! The days are very demanding yet amazing and surprising.
Chaos the laughter. I feel that many an Indonesian understand this idea. Sometime when it’s too much, you just have to laugh. Why not? It feels great and calms the inner/ outer turmoil, making it obsolete/ insignifiant in the larger picture. Hey I’m alive and breathing, nothing to complain about. And if there is, if something is wrong with the world ( which there is) then strive to do- anything.
Some of the first comments I get about being from the US and California. Arnold Schwarzenegger as the governor which I’m sure they find hilarious. Rambo! What?! Rambo??!Yes, every male is obsessed with Rambo. I guess all 2o or whoever many of the movies are played on tv quite often. That I find hilarious. Everyone loves Obama here, quick to ask about him. They seem to be proud that he lived here for some time and speaks Indonesian.
Something I get asked quite often, what I was doing here, why orangutans and if I had a husband. All important questions. And yes I do have a husband, he's Italian. Haha. I was told from the beginning that it's better to have a husband than a boyfriend or nothing at all because they will respect you more and the men wont bother you (as much).
Arriving at Tuanan
My first two days out in the forest, made everything worth it. No words can describe what it is like when you see your first orangtuan. My first day..walking on the boardwalk with much fright, aproachign the nesting site, to the hooting of a nearby owl. Arriving at the X in the transect, we walked in on the bushwacked trail and sat down close, below, waiting as the first light began to appear. The lighting of the forest is a remarkable sight. From pitch black to greys and as more light comes, you see some hints of green then suddenly it’s there, green all around and the forest is awake. This is around 6am, though life begins to stir earlier than that. Gibbons may start their duets around 5 am and if they are close enough you get a nice concert to start your day of following orangutans.
A typical day in the forest begins at 3:30 am. I get up from bed, a foam mattress on a frame especially “comissioned” for me with my name (spelled with a heart) at the head {or coming back to camp to start over} Light the oil lamp, get field clothes on, a quick breakfast of soupy instant oatmeal and instant coffee, then bag packed with clipboard and data sheets, hammock, camera, poncho, lunchbox (usually rice, tofu, egg, greenbeans). Fannypack with binculars, gps, mosquitoe repellent, headlamp on, parang strapped to my waist, feet vaselined up for protection (some) against all-day-wet-feet, and pants tucked into socks. Ready to go!
My first thought after two days in the forest, was that I cant believe this is really happening, that I’m here in Borneo. I it took me still some time to realize that I’m in the middle of the jungle. There was one moment in particular that sparked that awakening. One day I went out to search for orangutans with one of the assistants, Abuk. We originally thought we were going to do a day of fruit samples, which involves finding fruiting trees, collecting, Abuk climbing the trees if needed (one of my first days in the forest, I joined Erin to collect some flower samples and witnessed Abuk climb at least 15m up a tree just with his bare hands and feet) and then coming back to camp to process (weigh, measure) and dry them. But it had rained the wrath of Poseidon the night before so we were to search instead. We did the usual, stopping at transect intersections for 15 minitues or so and then move on, walking slowly, listening for movement or eating, smelling for any signs. It was around one o’clock when we heard a kiss squeak (a vocalization made when upset or bothered). I was not yet accustomed to this sound yet and didn’t realize what it was at first. We paused for a moment to listen for more. Nothing. Then there was movement and orange. Alas, an orangutan! This was a day when everyone went out to search and determined to find for we didn’t have any focals for a couple of days. The first thing Abuk asked me was if I had my headlamp. Nope. You? No. Oh. Something you always want to have just in case you end up staying out after dark. Well, maybe we wont need them, we’ll figure it out.Everything worked out but it was an adventure that I would not want to experience again. So we followed this unknown, kiss squeaking flanged male hoping that he wouldn’t make his nest too late. I wasn’t giving the idea much thought, but in the back of my mind wondering how we would find our way back. Time was going by and it was starting to get later, the light dissapearing and soon there would be none. I
I cant even begin to count all the times I've thought "I could never do this by myself," and so very thankful to be with an assistant.
Searching is almost as tiring as following, sometimes covering more ground. It is a guessing game as to where you may find orangutans and a lot of the time based on luck. Males can have large extensive home ranges, especially flanged males and females usually have a smaller, set one they tend to stay in so we do know where the more known and habituated mother-infant pairs reside for the most part.
I feel that every step I take (swamp, forest, boardwalk) is a test of strength where trust, confidence and faith will lead to great outcomes.
It is always just the beginning.
Let me tell you from three separate incidents, being sick in the jungles of S.E Asia is not fun. One morning when I was still very sick, Jubay(the young, beautiful cook) and the night guards Miso and Icun thought I had fainted in the mandi room, because I was taking so long from being deathly weak. I could hear them practicing my name with Abi. “ZO-E”…”JO-E.” Jo for short, somewhere between a j and a z. I will add it to the collection of all the different ways you can say my name in different countries.
I began to pefect the art of hand washing clothes, practicing everyday. By now I’ve come to appreciate the invention of washing machines. I got to know our pet monitor lizard Tony, slowly lurking around under the boardwalks, blue tongue in and out. I’ve become accustomed to the surrounding different sounds of the many bird calls, insect shrills and chirps, gibbons singing, rumbling thunder, animal crashes in the canopy, wind brushing through the dense forest and then the starting rain; it’s afternoon ritual, picking up at night, calming, soothing lulling, sometimes becoming hard and aggressive.
One morning I observed many butterflies bounding around. Sky blue with black specks, black with dark iridescent blue, black and white swallow tails, little yellow one, orange. Skinks are everywhere and squirrels are the rodents, sneaking in the kitchen when they think no one is watching.
It is hard being new at something, and just as difficult when things are new and unknown to you.In this new beginning of a new life adventure, where initial uncertainty and discomfort prevail, I can see that flexibility and optimism will be essential to keep the spirits up and gratitude to never give up, for everything leads to something.
It is very nice to wake up early in the morning with the first light, before the heat of the day.Walking on the path to Pasir Putih, the temperature was perfect, still cool and comfortable. In the open, on the edge of the forest, surrounded by lush ferns, it was beautiful and enjoyable. Erin pointed out some fig-like bush-berry the children had show her and we ate some. Jubai joined us on the klotok with Pak Ina to Ketunjung, where we visited the school. Later in the afternoon we went to the local Tuanan school where the children sang songs welcoming us. I went around and shook all their hands introducing myself and telling them I would soon come and teach the English, which they are very excited about, but that has yet to happen.
I look so forward to teaching English to the kids at Tuanan as well as a general respect for earth philosophy and awareness. Maybe even art and music and dance and stretching. I’m excited about the greenhouse and reforestation project if it is able to happen. In most moments, everything seems extraordinary and I feel enthusiastic and motivated about what’s to come.
I never realized that Orangutans are true omnivores. Here at Tuanan they eat ants and termites and have been seen eating birds as well, along with the general diet of fruit, flowers, leaves, bark. They have also been observed eating slow-lorises.
On my days off I enjoy walking out to the entrance of camp where there is an open are of land, perfect for watching the sunset.
We have a pet monitor lizard that lives under the woodpile with his mate and offspring. I saw him often my first two weeks here, when I was sick and camp bound. He would be the highlight of my day, lurking around in the leaflitter, climbing up to eat out of the garbage, with just one leg and tail sticking out. There is a sun bear that comes around at night sometimes and as it turns out he also comes around in the evening. Just one evening last week, the youngest assistant Idun pointed out to the boardwalk that leads away from camp and there he was, lumbering away. One night or early morning, I thought I heard noises outside my door and the next day in the forest, there were some black hairs on my parang.
Jungle Poems
Klean Kanteen
Dull orange btu shiny you are dinged but sturdy
The burning man sticker symbol of your past
You quench my thirst dutifully
Tiger Balm
Rub it everywhere to cool and soothe
Taking the itch away from jungle mosquito bites
Giving me the strength to overcome like a tiger
Parang
Carved and forged from the hands of an artist
Strong handle to hold and red wood to touch
Unsheathed you show me the path
It fascinated me that no matter how many times we may see a sunset, in different places, worlds, countries, settings, with already familiary colors, it never ceases to amaze- it is never the same, always new, always a first.
I love to notice the different ways children resemble their parents. It brings this immense feeling of satisfaction, something I cant quite put a name to. And it’s something I do almost instinctively, unconsciously as if to gain an understanding of origins and to see and experience connections.
And I love to observe and note people’s unique characteristics and idiosyncracies. Shapes of features, scars, laughs, smiles, movement, accents, saying.
Money is an universal evil and it saddens me that 3rd world capitalism exists and that traditional ancestral ways of living in harmony with nature and environment have been lost in many ways of most native communities of Dayaks. It is true that there needs to be a shift in the economy and its basis of resrouces to regional community development of independence and awakened empowerment from self-sustainable sustenance. Things need to start over from scratch and if Indonesia wants to follow the west, they need to realize and look at the grass roots movemtns, solutions and progression of the 21st century.
As a teacher I can at least engage the younger generations of children, in active understanding and participation in problem solving using both awareness of reality and power of imagination to overcome.
What a wonder it was, coming back to Tuanan on the Kapuas river, remembering to look to the forest on the left and wishing to see Proboscis monkeys then crahs movement in the trees and there they were! A group of four or five, just sitting there perched on branches with their big shnozz’s, looking as the klotok passed by.
One of the most emotionally challenging things here is controlling negative emotions like anger, especially directly towards someone. It is not something taken lightly here and will be remembered. When I see something that enrages me, like a 10 year old boy getting pressured to smoke cigarettes or people carelessly throwing trash into the river, once again, it infuriates and disgusts me. I hold my tongue, quietly cursing their ignorance, meanwhile thinking of what I could possibly do my year here. I plan I’ve already come up with the idea of going to the nearby village Pasir Putih and start picking up trash one day. It would at least be entertaining with different reactions and perhaps I could get the children interested. Most likely, everyone will think I am crazy but I’m willing to risk it. But then there’s the issue of where does the trash go next. At camp we burn it, like they do it most towns and cities.
Time for recycling. I wish to introduce the concept of recycling, reusing and reducing as well as the magic of composting and possibility of compost toilets, a no brainer and win-win situation.Stop polluting the river as much and turning waste into resources. Could a community center be built, where different activities and skills are taught? What if art, music, dance, learning could replace the desire of money and ideas of a western lifestyle?
There are many catch-22 situations here. Like with our boardwalk for an instance. It is made of wood, supposedly legal wood, okayed by the government and not supposed to be from protected areas. Firstly, just the fact that we are using wood cut down from a rainforest, protected or not protected, is an example of hypocrisy. Secondly, the boards probably last 5 years before they start falling apart, so it is very non-sustainable. That leaves us with using a different source or not having a boardwalk. The most ideal would to use that recycled plastic that often replaces wood, but it’s very doubtful that exists in Indonesia. What to do.
I find that it is quite difficult to see birds in the forest, hidden in the greenery, a blur as they fly by.It’s in the moments when I least expect it (as it seems for everything)a bird suddenly appears in clear view, in front of me, to the side, above. For example this very moment while writing, I looked out my window and saw a small bird, I believe a sunbird (the hummingbirds of the Old World), dusty yellow. The amazing hot pink, orange kingfisher on the river, greater coucal in the forest edge while walking back from pasir, glimpse of a hornbill while trying to escape Nico.
It is the most wonderful, beautiful feeling to have butterflies land on you, especially on your face, tickling skin.
After one particular day in the forest, of my first time searching, finding and following I realized and acceptedI am more of a beginner than I thought.
It was one of the most physically and mentally challenging days of my life. And I thought climbing Mt. Shasta was hard. I started out feeling unsure and doubtful about where to go, being with just an assistant, feeling he was unsure about being with me, facing and fearing the dreadful deathwish boardwalks, becoming frustrated, trying to laught it off even when I tripped and fell hard, bruising my leg. I couldn’t imagine every day being like that and I still cant, but it has become more easily acceptable for my mind and body, the physical labor of walking in a peat swamp, avoiding holes and the deep areas of water, walking on the roots, the sides, taking large high steps over roots, branches, lianas, fallen trees, trying to ignore being eaten alive by mosquitoes and looking out for fire ants. And then I remember what it is worth, to survive the challenges ofsuch an extreme, wild environment and its wildlife, to be surrounded by such a high density of biodiversity and then to find what you are looking for: orangutans! The days are very demanding yet amazing and surprising.
This place, Tuanan field station, Kalimantan, Borneo, is quickly becoming my home as I give all that I have, all that I am.
I feel such enduring strength from the love of my family and friends and just thinking of it helps me persist. Thank you all!!
Authors note: I wanted to put out some information before I take off for Bali. But it is all disorganized and I wasn't able to get photos up. But don't frett! More to come soon!
